Chills froze my bones as chilies set my heart ablaze.
I read the text the second time and thought I didn’t read right because of the migraine which often causes my vision to go blur. No, my eyes read right and my emotions responded. “Why did you call me tiny? ” I asked calmly trying to contain the scream in my heart. “Because I’m bigger than you”, the response came, coated with thick layer of laughter, “please don’t call me tiny, you don’t know how much I’ve struggled and I’m still struggling,” I cried my eyes balled out, the migraine getting worse.
Everyone thinks only plus size people struggle with body shaming and eating disorder. Two boyfriends walked away because of my body size, one said, “I wish you like the size 8 lady I met today.” Who says this on the face of their slender girlfriends?
Well, I’m weighing 39 Kgs, I’ve stepped into hospitals and nurses question my health because my weight doesn’t match my age. 39 Kgs is so low for a 24-year-old.
I meet ladies with healthy sizes and I wish I could get there. The times I’ve been with mum I even tell her, “mummy if I get to that size I’ll be smart “. As a mother it’s hard for her to hear her daughter say this to her. I’ve tried junk food; I’ve tried squats to build my butt. I hate long pants because they’ll expose my tiny self. Skirts and dresses work for me; I do pants when it’s extremely cold.
Bones protruding on my neck and just right above my breast is not such a comfortable sight for me.
I didn’t understand why I’m so bony until I came to know it’s HMI (heart membrane inflammation) and Para cardiac pneumonia that were chewing down my weight, cold affects me that much including aching of bones. But will you explain this to everyone who mocks you concerning your body size? Of course not. What do you do instead?
You accept yourself as you are.
To those who body shame others,
- He created us in His own image. Meaning we should only identify each other with God’s image, perfect.
- Did you know body shaming others is a sign of low self-esteem? So instead of body shaming others, begin embracing others.
- Negative statements to people only bring negativity to your soul. Most are sad people inside hence find outside happiness in body shaming others. So why don’t we bring beauty into our hearts by speaking beautiful words concerning people’s sizes? Well, it’s not even necessary saying a thing about one’s body. Is it?
If you are struggling with body shaming,
- find your identity in Christ. In Genesis God said He was creating in His own image, and so whether you are plus size or slim you’re in God’s image.
- It’s okay to join in the joke, I know this ain’t perfect, but in some instances it’s worked for me, “I’ll run fastest if robbers broke in here” “I can do all dances”
- Affirm yourself. I started a habit of looking at myself in the mirror and telling myself “I’m beautiful, perfect like God had me in His thoughts. My flat tummy looks great on my tiny self “
- This is to all sizes, slim, medium, plus, let’s praise each other. Your plus size looks great on this mermaid dress, no I think that short looks beautiful on your slim body,”
Remember, you find your identity in Christ and ground yourself there. When God was done with creation, He looked and said it was good. We are all part of that creation which He looked at and called good. He created us in His own image. Meaning we should only identify each other with God’s image, perfect.
If you are struggling with body shaming, find your identity in Christ.
Kim walker has a song called ” you define me”. I pray it blesses you.
If you’d like to share your story on a given topic, email me : email@example.com